I knew that our trip to California would have some sort of spiritual significance, because every trip Jeff and I have ever taken has had some sort of spiritual revelation attached to it big or small. However, I did not know that it would be so personal to me or what God wants to use me for, He is showing me things even now as we zoom down the hill from Fayetteville to Fort Smith to go home after a week in Los Angeles for what I thought was really more of just a family vacation, but has become so much more.
I am generally fearful of new things and a bit lazy, I have spent my life this way and although God has grown me up by leaps and bounds, these human tendencies are hanging on to me like burs used to stick to my socks on Grannies farm when I was 10. (you southerners know what I mean…a stroll through the tall grass and you’ll have 30 or so, then they prick you when you try to pull them off!)
There are gifts and abilities God has given me that I can do easily without being led by the Spirit, they are things that were a challenge once upon a time when I couldn’t do them without Him, but now with practice, have become easy, I can do them in my own strength…but I DON’T WANT TO! I don’ t want to be in a place where the things I do everyday are easy and I get in a rut of pride and laziness…so what do I do?